BewildereD........

Now it seems life is ready to take a very sharp u-turn.

After bidding goodbye to some of my best buddies and after attending 4 days of the training programme by the firm I have been placed in, I suddenly feel like a grown up.

10 years back when I had nothing other than my school stuff to bother about and nobody caring to even involve me in any other so-called important matters and decisions, how bad I urged that i was an adult.

When i saw the "bade log" going out and taking care of all important matters, i wished somebody took me serious enough to ask my views over some of those issues.

Today when I actually have earned the position when I am being asked to take bigger decisions on my own and live life on my terms, I feel this impulse of going 10 years back, again to my childhood days. 

I want to go back to those times when nobody looked forward to what was my say on the significant cuts of life.

I want to go back to those days when the schedule of a regular day was all about getting ready in the morning for school, waiting for the school bus at 5:30 a.m. , enjoying the 6 hours of everyday school life with friends, standing at the bus gate waiting for the dismissal bell, going back home and wait eagerly for the clock to tick 5 p.m. so that i could run out of the house to play outdoor games, completing my home-work , packing my bag for the next day and going off to bed.

Life has reached the crossroad where i very well knew it would some day, ready to reveal the newer dimensions of life, offering the openings to new opportunities and to meet more people.

But each day as i move closer to this new sphere, i feel those butterflies inside my stomach which i used to get before going to take the exams or on the report card day during school times.

It is very difficult to understand this strange flavor of life all of a sudden. 

And bidding adieu to my pals is making all of it much more worse.

I wish I never grew up at all.

I wish my parents took all these vital decisions for me as they did earlier.

And most of all I wish I never had to part from my friends.

Time seems to be slipping out of my hand like grains of sand and although i want to hold on to it so bad, it is impossible.

All i can do now is to have patience and loads of courage to take life head-on as it comes.